Category Archives: Fostering Effective Relationships

4 Ideas To Have A Successful First Year as Principal

I am so intrigued with the number of people that are jumping into principal positions as I think it is truly one of the best jobs in the world.  It is also one of the toughest.  Isolation within a school (even though that is a choice that we now make ourselves) has been kind of a norm in past years, so to have a shared focus as a school is foreign territory for many (including principals).  Yet with a constant focus on “change”, many principals bring people together, but often for the wrong reasons.  If you move to fast, that can often lead to strained relationships within a school and resentment towards the new “leader”.  As much as principals want to make it “our school”, many admin really try to make it “their school”, or at least, that is the picture that they paint to their staff.  Sometimes you need to move slow to go fast.

Here are some things that I have learned from my time in both success and failures.

1. Build strong relationships first.  If you did a “Wordle” on my blog, I am guessing the term “relationships” would be the word that is in the top five for being most used.  Although this may seem redundant, to emphasize the importance of this over and over again, is something that cannot be understated.  The investment you make in your staff, students, and community will come back tenfold, but it takes time to build trust.  I have watched administrators like Patrick Larkin, Kathy MeltonJason Markey, Amber Teamann, and Jimmy Casas show and share the significance that they put into people.  This is not just your teachers either.

Every single person on your staff is an important part of the team and should be treated in that same manner.  Make sure that you connect with every person on that staff and know something that goes beyond the building.

One of my favourite things to do with the community was to wait for the busses and talk to kids and parents as they arrived to school.  Talking to kids is huge and a great proactive way to avoid issues later, while also being visible to the community.  It also builds credibility with staff.  Relationships, relationships, relationships.  Trust me, it is the most important part of the job and the foundation that all great schools are built upon.

2. Find the value of every staff member.  I tweeted the following yesterday:

Principals often want to make a splash with staff and bring in “gurus” to move them ahead, but I truly believe that most schools have everything they need within the building, we just have to find a way to bring it all together.  It is not that you shouldn’t look for outside help ever, as a differing perspective helps sometimes, but you should also balance that with having your own staff deliver professional development as well.  This builds capacity and relationships (see number one) within your building.

Every person in your organization has something to offer.  What is it? This is fundamental to “strengths based leadership” and people that know they are valued will go above and beyond. There is a difference between “developing” and “unleashing” talent; a great principal does both.

Great leaders develop great leaders.

3.  Show instructional leadership. There used to be a belief that “those who can’t teach, become principals”.  This drives me crazy.  The other idea is that the principal should be the best teacher in the school.  That is also a fallacy.  Some teachers are absolutely amazing and have no interest in becoming principals; there is nothing wrong with that.  You do however, need to show credibility in your role as principal.  This could be in delivering professional development to your staff or teaching a class, or even a combination of both.  Teachers connect well with teachers, and when they see that their principal, no matter the position, is still a teacher, it shines a different light on them.  When you teach, it also reminds you that the “change” that we try to implement is not as easy as it sounds with 25 kids in a classroom.  It is possible, but it takes time and this perspective that you gain by staying current in your own teaching practices is important.

4.  Don’t focus on “change” as much as you focus on “growth”.  Change and growth are often synonymous but the words sometimes the words evoke different emotions.  If you walk into a school and constantly talk about “change” or how you are going to create the “best school yet”, you are disrespecting the work that has been done prior by the same staff that you are now serving.  I agree that there are lots of things that need to “change” about schools, but I also know there are lots of great things that have already happened in many organizations.  Growth is different.  We expect it from kids and we should expect it from ourselves.  You may have seen the light and changed your teaching practice, but my guess is that you didn’t change every aspect of what you used to do.  You probably got better.  And when you ask for “growth”, make sure you model how you are growing as an administrator as well.  Say when you screw up, admit mistakes, apologize, learn openly, and do things that show you want to get better in your role to model what you want from your staff.  Modelling growth moves from saying, “do this”, to “let’s do this together”.  Very different ideas with the latter being much more effective.

Everyone wants to make a big splash when they are starting a new job, and administrators are no different.  Yet sustainable growth takes time and as Covey states, it is important as a leader to show “character and credibility”.  Both of these things take time.  You may have a vision of where you want school to go but the best leaders hold that vision and break it down in smaller steps so that people can gain confidence and competence in the process.  If you want to create something great, it will take time and will only come from the people that are a part of your learning community.  Honour and tap into them and you will move further than you could have ever imagined.

Investing in Individuals First

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“Every single employee is someone’s son or someone’s daughter. Parents work to offer their children a good life and a good education and to teach them the lessons that will help them grow up to be happy, confident and able to use all the talents they were blessed with. Those parents then hand their children over to a company with the hope the leaders of that company will exercise the same love and care as they have.” Simon Sinek

With the focus on “collaboration” in many organizations being the forefront in what they do, we often forget that each team that exists within an organization is made up of individual people.  People are often asked to sacrifice for the “good of the team”, but this does not happen unless a safe culture is created by its leaders.

If you are spending a third of your day working with others, we have to realize how important each person is and how much we need to care for these individuals.  Simply saying, “we are a team”, does not make it so.  In fact, that constant push for collaboration without caring for individuals often pulls teams apart and creates an “every person for themselves” mentality.  The “greater good” does not happen without individuals and when people are asked to work long hours and sacrifice, they are more likely to do it when they know they are valued as people first, and employees second.

When I have worked for people that have taken the time to care for me personally, my loyalty to them is unwavering and sacrifice is simple.  Those moments that we simply “check-in” with one another builds that trust daily, and often forges the team.  This does not happen without great leadership constantly building trust with individuals to create a strong team.

One thing that I have seen from great leaders that has made a huge difference is how they are truly in the moment with you.

Every educator is busy; how many have you met that don’t know what to do with the abundance of time that they have left over?  “Busy” is a given that we do not really need to share in every conversation.  What I have seen some of the best leaders do when they talk to people is not share how they only have a “few moments” to talk when their colleagues come talk to them, but they make them feel welcome and are glad to have the conversation in the first place.

Yes, you are probably busy, but the time a leader takes to really talk to someone when they have the chance, often comes back in spades from people who will go above and beyond for someone who makes them feel valued, as opposed to simply watching a clock for those that seemingly do not care.  Just like with our students, when we take time to build relationships with our colleagues there is an initial time investment that is made at the beginning that pays off greatly later on.  That’s why it is called an “investment”.

Now that many people are going back to school, it is easy to talk about the bigger “we”, but remember that your team are made up of individuals.  We need to cherish each person and their strengths AND weaknesses before we can do something great together.

“We need to build more organizations that prioritize the care of human beings. As leaders, it is our sole responsibility to protect our people and, in turn, our people will protect each other and advance the organization together.” Simon Sinek

P.S.  This post was inspired from reading the new Simon Sinek book , “Leaders Eat Last”, that was suggested from my recent visit to Richland Two School District in South Carolina.  It has been fantastic so far!

Our Kids

Last Friday night, I sent out the following tweet:

With many people sharing the tweet, and taking the time to comment on a Friday night (she received 21 comments…not bad for her second blog post!), it really reminded me how much teachers care for kids.  And when I say “kids”, I am not talking about kids in their class, but kids anywhere.  Naomi received comments from all over North America, and even Australia.  Can you imagine what this does for her to help her keep writing and learning, even over the summer months?  Every person that took the time to write, even if it was only for a few seconds, made a difference.  (Side note…I have never shared a blog to #comments4kids hashtag that William Chamberlain hasn’t commented on.  What a great guy for always taking the time to do that.)

Yet when I see how a lot of schools are set up, we seem to be in competition with other schools, districts, and sometimes people in the same building.  Why is that?  When you became a teacher, was it to help kids, or to only help the specific kids you in your class?  I know that with the majority of teachers that I have connected with, any student that is placed in front of them is a kid that teacher will do everything for to help them become better.  What happens when we look at all students as “our kids”?  The imperative share becomes much greater.

So this is why sharing has become so important in our work today.  Every little bit we share with one another, helps a kid somewhere.  Whether it is taken in its exact form, or it is remixed to meet the needs of our class, that “share” does something for kids.  Does it matter if they are across the hall or even across the globe?  I became an educator to help kids. It doesn’t matter where they are from.

Paraphrasing Dean Shareski, it is our moral obligation to share with one another in the field of education.  I believe that the more I go into classrooms and see what teachers do all of the time.  I always think of the “obvious to you, amazing to others” video, and the humble nature of teachers who often think that what they do is not that significant.  You never know the impact of what you share could have on a kid somewhere.  If it makes an impact on one teacher or one kid, somewhere else, isn’t that enough?

We sometimes do not see the impact of our sharing on others, but that is not reason enough to not do it.  I saw the following quote today and it really struck me:

“If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more, and become more, you are a leader.” John Quincy Adams

The “sharing” that we do often does all of the things listed above, and if it helps kids, no matter where they are, it is definitely worth it.

P.S. If you want to see a great video on the power of “sharing”, I loved the one below:

The Importance of Emotional Leadership

In about my sixth year of teaching, I remember sharing a story about my dogs with my grade 9 students.  As I was on my own in a small town where I didn’t know many people, the dogs were a HUGE part of my life and this wasn’t the first or last time I would talk about them.  They were and are like family to me.  When I was really getting into the story, one of my students shouted out in the middle of the class and said, “We don’t want to hear another story about your stupid dog.”

Years prior, I probably would have asked her to leave, got frustrated at the comment, and would have shown anger before anything.  This time I didn’t.  Instead, I said to her, “Those dogs are a huge part of my life and when you say something like that it really hurts me.”  Her facial expression and demeanour changed quickly, as did several of others in the class.  I was no longer simply a “teacher”, but a person, with real feelings and emotions.  After that moment, I felt a real change in how I was treated by students and, in all honesty, how I treated them.  It changed a lot for me.

As a principal, it would have been easy to fake emotions and represent that nothing had bothered or stressed me out, but in reality, I was never like that.  When Kobe (my first dog) had died, I struggled at school.  I spent a lot of time in my office and would often cry to my staff when they shared their condolences.  To many, this would be sign of a weakness, but in reality, I would say the exact opposite.  To be able to show who you are and share emotion is strength. Denying it and pretending I was feeling something else would not be true to myself.  We show our true strength when we accept that that we are vulnerable.

As a speaker, it is not easy to cry in front of people, but sometimes by showing emotion, I feel it is what makes me relatable.  Although I talk a lot about education, it is often the stories of my dad passing away, moments with my family, and my dogs that I often hear resonated most with others.  Every single person you have met has dealt with hardships in their life, and when they see someone being able to talk about similar experiences and share what they have learned from them, that is often what sticks with them.

This is not to say you need to share every part of your life, as I, like many educators, value my privacy as well.  But there are parts of YOUR story that will make an impact, and showing that you are having a rough day is showing that you are a person.  I spoke the following week after my dad died, and the day after I lost Shaq.  I cried profusely in front of people as I shared those stories with them.  The hugs that I received after both of those talks went WAY beyond people learning “stuff”, but went into deeper connections, for the audience and most definitely myself.  Think about it…if you were going to be vulnerable in front of any profession in a world, wouldn’t the best group to do that in front of be a group of educators where being loving and caring is an unwritten part of their job?

Yet I have seen many people walk into new roles and put on a tough demeanour and move away from who they truly are.  They implement the “don’t smile until December” rule and stick with it.  They constantly put people at arm’s length as they act as if showing emotion would be a sign of weakness.  Ironically with many, their emotion, their passion, and their story, which they have shared with me, is the exact reason that I have connected with them in the first place.  I talked to one new principal this week and he said his main focus for the beginning of his time at a new school was not about implementing a bunch of different things, but connecting and learning about his new staff while they learn about him. That focus on “connecting” was perfect and why I know that he is going to be successful.  Life is often a roller coaster ride with many ups and downs that we are all experiencing and asking for help is showing much more strength than simply giving up.

So as many people go into new roles next year, and try different things, my advice would be to show and be true to yourself.  Emotional leadership, showing humility, and being genuine, are not only sharing pieces of who you are, but they also show confidence, which is vital to successful leadership.  You and your colleagues will have ups and downs, as will your students.  Getting back up only happens when we fall down in the first place; they are both important parts to the story..  When we are in a field that is focus on developing people, no matter what your role is, showing your “human side” is vital.

Telling stories is often the best way for people to move forward, but don’t forget to put YOU into that narrative.  That is often the most important part.

As I wrote this on the plane, when I landed I read this post by Nicholas Provenzano, this one from Leah Whitfordand this one by Amber Teamann that are powerful examples of what I tried to articulate in this post.

The joy of learning

The ability to connect on Twitter has become one of the biggest blessings in my life.  I have connected with some of the best minds, but in reality, I have made my strongest relationships through the medium as well.  It is not just about what I have learned, but it is often about the enjoyment I have in learning with others.  If you look at my Twitter feed at any point, it can range from goofy conversations about Applebees, discussing opportunities in the classroom or leadership, sharing music, or sharing videos of dogs to make people smile.  The balance for me is important.

When we plan for students, we too often focus solely on the “learning”?  If a kid enjoys texting and connecting with friends, and actually becomes more literate, why can’t that be a powerful opportunity for kids?

Sometimes we get so focused on the “stuff” that we forget the “joy” (as Dean Shareski would say) that can happen during informal learning.

How much do you remember from your grade 2 science exam?

Exactly.

I promise you that if learning can be “fun” and have some choice, more people will love to do it.  I love the learning that happens in social media but I know that I keep coming back for the connections and happiness it brings me.

Fun can be a great thing for learning. Let’s not forget that while we are trying to get through a curriculum at the end of the year.  The “stuff” will fade from a kid’s memory, but that connection to their heart won’t.

A Little Piece of Yourself

The best teachers in the world connect with their students on some personal level.  

I have always believed that.  It does not mean that you share every element of your personal life, but it does mean that you do share parts.  The teachers that impacted me, I remember knowingmore about them than simply what they taught, and it is the reason I became a teacher.  I wanted to make that same impact.

So why do we believe something different when it comes to social media?  Many people are worried about revealing too much about themselves and that will somehow be an invasion of privacy, yet it is always up to the individual on “what” and “how much” they share.  My personal belief and guideline on social media is the following:

“Whatever you can say to a classroom of students is what you can say online.”

If you follow that, you should not only be fine but you can make some pretty powerful connections.

Which brings me to why I am writing this in the first place…

After a presentation that I had made for Peel District School Board in Ontario, I had an educator approach me and tell me that she wanted me to share a story.  As she teared up, I worried about how I might have offended her or said something wrong.  Actually the opposite.

In my tweets, I have shared music I like to the hashtag #georgetunes.  I am a huge music fan, and although I share the occasional One Direction or Wham song (as a joke…maybe not), I am a huge fan of a lot of very mellow music such as William Fitzsimmons, Iron and Wine, and Keane, which has led people to sharing music from bands from The Avett Brothers.  This is something that I would have shared with students so it is not something I was reluctant to share online.

So as this “stranger” shared her story with me, she told me about how someone suggested that she follow me on Twitter.  Although she shared that she appreciated my educational tweets, she really enjoyed a lot of the music that I shared, as we had similar tastes.

And then her mother passed away.

She took a risk, reached out to a stranger (my email is listed on my blog), and shared that she connected with me on Twitter, loved the music I shared, and told me about how her mom had passed.  She then asked me a suggestion for a song.  Of course, I responded immediately, and gave her a suggestion to which she told me that played at her mom’s funeral.  She thanked me for not only responding, but for being willing to share in the first place.

I have not stopped thinking about what she told me and her story.

People have made fun of me for sharing some stuff online (like #georgetunes), but I don’t see myself as an “educator first”, but a person with many sides and interests.  Those connections are what I believed in as an educator, and carry over to what I do online.  I also have been reminded once again that every little thing you share can make a big impact, no matter how insignificant it may seem, so try to focus on the positive.  Who knows what it can do for someone else.

It’s not you Twitter, it’s me.

Yesterday, I read and shared an article from the Atlantic entitled, “A Eulogy for Twitter”.  It talked about the demise of the social network and how something is just not right:

Something is wrong on Twitter. And people are noticing.

Or, at least, the kind of people we hang around with on Twitter are noticing. And it’s maybe not a very important demographic, this very weird and specific kind of user: audience-obsessed, curious, newsy. Twitter’s earnings last quarter, after all, were an improvement on the period before, and it added 14 million new users for a total of 255 million. The thing is: Its users are less active than they once were. Twitter says these changes reflect a more streamlined experience, but we have a different theory: Twitter is entering its twilight.

There already have been rebuttals to the article, and although it talks a lot about the demographics and use of the platform, I would actually challenge that the rise and fall of Twitter (or any other social network) might not be something that we would look at from the viewpoint of group, but more from a personal perspective.

Stay with me here…

Twitter, depending on the day, can be either the greatest thing, the most boring thing, the most overwhelming thing, or something I simply don’t pay attention to.  But is it really Twitter or my use of it?

It’s not you Twitter, it’s me.

From my perspective, Twitter shares two main purposes in my own use that are extremely valuable.  The first is the “social” aspect.  I can go on there and see familiar faces, talk about happenings in the world, sporting events, or just joke around.  Some of my best friends that I have met started simply as profile pictures and a 140 character bio.  Avatars to friends.

The other aspect is the “learning” component.  I would say that since I started using Twitter to connect with educators and see not only what was happening in other schools, but to also get ideas and perspectives about education as a whole.  I have learned a lot about education systems in other countries around the world when five years ago, I might not have had that perspective.  The ability to talk to people, and not just “look up stuff”, has made this network invaluable to the work that I do in my own practice.

Social + Learning = Engagement (for me)

From what I have seen, people that use it for simply one or the other, and not both (in the education field), don’t stick around too long.  Our minds can get full and I do not need to continuously learn every second of the day, and the social aspect is something that many people can get from the connections that already exist in their world.  After a full week, the last thing I want to do sometimes is read an article on education related.  My mind is full and I want to decompress.  When I am watching a game with friends, I don’t need to tweet about it because I would rather enjoy the experience with the people in the room.  Yet, when I am by myself, the connection to others through social media makes the game that much more interesting.

So what does this mean?

Well, Twitter has already seen it’s demise in the eyes of individuals.  If the user experience is not being met, why stay on the network?  And that experience is not necessarily defined by the usability of the social network (although I am not a fan of the new profile), but in the way individuals use it.  There are people that I used to always connect with on Twitter that don’t share much on the network anymore.  Is it because Twitter has become meaningless to them, or something else in their life has grabbed more attention?  When I looked at my own use of Twitter through the archives, I could see a decrease or increase in tweets and I could directly correlate that with events happening in my life.

It’s not you Twitter, it’s me.

The thing that I do love about Twitter, is that the experience is personal and although some are predicting it’s demise, if it works for you, that’s what matters.   I know that when I have those times in my life where I want to take a break from that large network, it’s okay, because it’s going to be there when I am ready to come back, along with many of the people I have met, and the people I am looking forward to meet in the future.  The learning aspect of Twitter has been tremendous in my development, but the social aspect, the people that I have met and don’t want to lose that continuous connection with, that’s why I continuously come back.

“If you screw up…”

I heard a story about an administrator saying that he now had the ability to deal with teachers that were sharing “inappropriate tweets”.

And we wonder why so many teachers are terrified to use social media or try something new.

So many people share the messages, “If you screw up, we will…”, and then wonder why their organization doesn’t embrace change?

Change comes at a risk, and with that risk, comes the opportunity to screw up.  It is not “if”, it is “when”.  New paths lead to mistakes; it is part of the process.

How do you deal with it?  Better yet, how do you encourage it?

I still believe that many administrators continuously blame teachers and say they don’t embrace change, but I continue to see that many “leaders” are just simply terrible at selling change in the first place.

Easy to blame, hard to do the work.

It’s not me, it’s you.

Really?

Oh and by the way, if you are an administrator and this is your mantra and behaviour with teachers, what do you think the trickle-down effect will be with students?

Nothing amazing will ever happen when you continuously build a culture of fear.

New to admin? Here is the best way to connect with your staff.

With many people jumping into administrator roles that will be starting in the 2014-2015 school year, I am often asked, “What is the best way to connect with staff?”

My answer to this?  Connect with kids.

Many administrators that are new want to implement changes or try some bold ideas, and with a lack of experience, it can often come off to their staff as arrogant.  Even with a ton of experience, it can replicate that same feeling.  A lack of experience, or even a lack of experience in a school community, can sometimes be seen as a fault.

But what most teachers care about universally is the students.  That is why they do what they do.  So if they know that you, as the new “leader” of the school care about the kids just as much as they do, and show it openly, it will not only buy you a lot of time as you are learning your new role, it will also help you build credibility.

So go out at recess with the kids, spend time in the hallway with them, and go visit their classrooms to not observe the teacher, but to connect with the students.

If your staff see these interactions (and they will), they are likely to see that you are there for the same reasons they are.  To do what is best for kids.

And if you can’t show that, maybe you are in the wrong place.

It’s About the Work

I sometimes struggle with the notion of publicly recognizing the work of teachers that publicly share their work on Twitter in our school district.  Although I do it anyway, I have always worried about the perception that some teachers might gauge others as “favourites”.

After bringing this notion up with Brian Woodland, Director of Communication for Peel School Board, he talked about the idea that it is not the teacher that you are necessarily sharing, but the work of the teacher.  As we went back and forth on this concept, we talked about the notion of making great learning viral and how this is really not much different than asking a teacher to share something at a staff meeting that has been done, it just has the potential to be spread to a much larger audience.

Chris Kennedy and I talked about this concept as well and his belief was that if someone was taking the time to share something great, one thing that he should try to do is acknowledge them on a wider basis.  When I asked him about teachers that might become jealous, he had told me that if any of them mentioned that if they thought it was unfair, to show him some great stuff that there were doing and he would gladly share it to a larger audience.

So what’s the difference between acknowledging a person through an email or through a social network and allowing the world to see.  Well if we focus that is not directly focusing on the teacher, but the impact that the teacher is making on the students that they work with, and that if it is shared to a larger audience, it will make a larger impact, then we are doing it for the right reasons.

When we get upset about this sharing, are we really focused on creating great learning opportunities for our students?

My suggestion if you are uneasy with this as an administrator?  Have a conversation with your staff and tell them that you are wanting to share great examples of learning as you see them by your staff as it makes us all better, and you will do your best to share the work of all those willing to post into a shared public space (for example Twitter, Google Plus, etc.).

If we want to make these great learning opportunities viral, we are going to have to share them.